Stupid, Stubborn Idiots -- Tucker/Reed

[A Moment In Subtext]

Enterprise
stupid, stubborn, retarded, blind idiots
By. A Moment In Subtext

"Ah was just flirtin' with her!" Trip protested. "How was ah supposed to know her people would take it as a deathly insult!?"
"Perhaps if you'd actually read the security information I gave you at the briefing, you - you - you lecherous, womanizing bastard!"
"Ah am not. I'll have you know, mah parents were married."
Malcolm sighed in exasperation. "I don't know why I keep agreeing to let you come on these types of missions. We both know you're going to get us into trouble."
"Aw, Mal, that's not fair."
"So its fair for you to drag me along when you run for your life, but not for me to compain about it?" He arched an eyebrow as smoothly as any Vulcan.
"That's not-"
"Shut the hell up." He snapped. "I am so goddamn sick of you, Commander. What the hell is wrong with you?"
Trip sighed. "Yah want the truth?"
"As opposed to a lie, yes." He put his hands on his hips and fixed his superior with his sternest look.
"Ah like watching yah get angry." The other man admitted after a moment.
"You what?" Malcom asked in disbelief.
"Ah like-" He began slowly, carefully enunciating each word.
"I heard you the first time. But why?"
"Because you're beautiful." Trip said quietly.
"I'm. . .you. . .oh." He finished, unable to come up with a suitable reply. "Thats. . .uh. . ."
"Do yah suppose its safe fer us ta go out there yet?" Trip offered graciously.
"Probably." Malcolm said, relief obvious in his voice. He walked over to the single door and pushed it open. "Let's go."
"Stupid, stubborn, retarded, blind idiots!" A voice shouted as the door slammed shut. "Why can't they just get together already?!"
"Because they are stupid, stubborn, retarded, blind idiots." Another voice answered. "Your matchmaking failed. Can we go now?"